In fast-paced meetings with stacked agendas, building real connection might seem like a luxury you can’t afford. But in this short post, I share two ultra-practical, field-tested methods that help you create meaningful connections in just a few minutes without sacrificing depth.
These ideas aren’t theoretical. They’ve been tested with everyone from 6,000-person arena audiences to tight-knit executive teams. Let’s jump in.
The Goodbye Method
Here is a quick “icebreaker” that goes comfortably deep.
Ever noticed how goodbyes bring out the truth in people?
A few weeks ago, a “For Sale” sign went up in front of my house in Pittsburgh. Suddenly, neighbors (who usually offered a simple nod or “hello”) were walking up with tears in their eyes, saying things like:
“Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re leaving. I thought you’d be here forever.”
These weren’t just small talk moments. They were packed with meaning and appreciation.
The same urgency happens when someone close to us is in their final days. In my own life, during the last two weeks with my late co-founder Will Wise, I found myself expressing things I needed to say while I still had the chance.
There’s something powerful in that urgency to share what matters.
How to Apply the Goodbye Method at Work
Use that same psychology in your meetings but without the doom and gloom. Just ask:
“If this was your last day working with this colleague, what encouragement would you offer them?”
This question skips the surface-level chatter and invites people to say something that is both positive and real.
➡️ Pro Tip: Make sure the question stays appreciative and uplifting.
This is a great prompt to use as:
- Icebreakers for work meetings
- Connection-building in team huddles
- Quick but meaningful check-ins for icebreakers for small groups of adults
The Next 15 Minutes: A Time-Folding Team Exercise
This gem comes from my brother Ben (who also keeps We and Me running smoothly on the product side. Thanks, Ben! 👏).
Here’s how it started:
We were wrapping up a team meeting. Action items were flying, and we were seconds from clicking “End Meeting.” That’s when Ben asked:
“What would you like the next 15 minutes to look like?”
Brilliant.
Just speaking the answer to that question created enough social accountability that it actually shaped how we used those next 15 minutes. Everyone took ownership.
Try This for Lightning-Fast Connection Before Content
Kick off a meeting with:
“Hey, I know we’re all super busy and have a packed agenda. As our connection before content, jump into groups of three and answer:
‘What would you love the first 15 minutes of our meeting to look like?’”
✅ Give it a few minutes. ✅ Popcorn out the ideas. ✅ Let the group vote or decide together.
✅ Then, go and do that.
In just a few minutes, people feel seen, heard, connected, and you’ve already started working in the way they most want to work.
Efficiency vs. Connection: A Counterintuitive Truth
Let me get close to the camera for this one, my late co-founder, Will used to say that:
“Efficiency is the enemy of connection.”
If you’re here hoping for a 30-second hack to meaningful connection, I’ve got news: Perhaps it’s worth investing real time instead of cramming connection into the margins. Why?
Because as Peter Block says:
“Without relatedness, no real work can occur.”
Think about heist movies like Ocean’s Eleven. The crew doesn’t need long planning sessions. They’ve worked together before, they’re deeply connected, and all George Clooney has to say is:
“Let’s do what we did in Panama.”
Boom. Instant understanding. No explanation needed. That’s what a strong connection base gives you: efficiency after connection.
