Hey, this video is going to be a little bit different. This video is going to be just some raw storytelling from a mildly burnt-out entrepreneur. Ironically on the topic of “How to Avoid Burnout as an Entrepreneur?” As you might expect, I’m not going to share all the answers. But I’m just going to share a couple experiences that I’ve been having. And you know, this is a little unconventional because my channel is usually focused on helping educators and leaders make connection and engagement easy. Although I’ll say that one of the most common things I hear when I’m working with some of the top universities and organizations on the planet, even really high performing ones that we think are just all roses and butterflies at work, one of the most common struggles that I hear is “How do we avoid burnout?” In this video, I’m going to share some a-ha’s that I had today while oscillating between motivated and burnt-out.
Blog Note: The following is an adapted and edited transcript of one of our daily YouTube tutorials. We know sometimes it is easier to scroll through written content which is why we are publishing here. Because of that, there may be typos or phrases that seem out of context. You’ll definitely be able to get the main idea. To get the full context, visit our YouTube channel here. And if you want to watch the video on this topic specifically, you can scroll down to the bottom of this post to access it as well.
Miscommunication
The story all begins with these boxes and a giant miscommunication. I had a thousand decks of We! Engage Cards that were supposed to be shipped to a warehouse so that when orders came through, people could get their orders of their cards. There was just… You know, they were moving 1,000 decks from one warehouse to the other. And somehow, instead of the warehouse address, we ended up with my home address. For 6 days straight, 5 to 10 boxes from Amazon showed up on my step all about 40 pounds, 50 pounds each. They’re pretty heavy. This came at a time where I was already feeling a little bit uh burnt-out, a little fried. Although, I don’t look like it there. And this is a really important thing to know about burnout is on the surface, you may not see it. Burnout sometimes shows up… And sometimes it’s obvious, right? People are just like they’re not showing up for work on time, they’re just checked out. But sometimes people are right on the edge of being totally fried but they’ve got a smile on their face and they’re showing up to work and they’re going to all your meetings, etc. Which is true for me, right? On days where I’m teetering, I’m like, “I think I need a break.” If I have a session or a workshop to lead with a client I’m not going to… I don’t want to show up in that state. I shift that state. But right after that session, that exhaustion still exists. I, today had a couple a-ha. Continuing the story, I had to unpack all these boxes, repack them. I did recruit my brother to help. It was quite useful. We got all these boxes and I eventually opened up the trunk of my car and started unloading all of them. Oh, my goodness. I was pretty covered in sweat after that.
To be really raw with you, this shirt hasn’t been washed since that happened. Loaded up all the boxes closed the trunk then I got to the store. And look really closely here. Something really magical happened. See the woman in the purple? I was feeling really really burnt out and this woman who had a cane at the UPS store insisted on holding the door while I carried all 16 of these boxes into the store. Insisted on holding the door even though I said, “No, no. It’s okay. Have a seat, have a seat. I got it. I set up a system. I can kind of get…. I can get it, I can get it, I can get it, I can get it.” And on the like 14th box, you can’t hear it because it’s a time-lapse. But on the 14th box, I finally was like, “You know, thank you. Thanks for your generosity. Thanks for pouring some good into the world.” This happened to have happened on October 31st which is Halloween in the United States. It’s a pretty cool little Halloween treat. And I’m sharing that with you because I think when we’re burnt out, oftentimes, we find what we’re looking for or we hear what we’re listening for.
When I’m getting burnt out, I’m listening and I’m paying attention to all the ways that I’m fried and all the ways that my work is hard or exhausting are all the things that I have to do rather than get to do, right? And my attention starts going all in this direction which spirals and contributes to that burnout. Now, with a very simple perspective shift, the world is filled with lots of other things other than what exhausts you and bores you and whatever, right? It’s filled with generosity. It’s filled with learning. And in fact, ironically, in the deck of We! Engage Cards of which there are 1,000 of in my living room, one of the quotes from the deck is this idea that Mistakes are the portals to discovery. And how valuable is that concept? For me, I was just thinking, “This is so annoying. I should not be spending my time unpacking, repacking.” It took like a total of over the course of a couple days. A total of like 6 to 8 hours to unpack and repack these boxes, right? Not ideal way to spend my time especially with a little newborn.
My learning is to be really deliberate in communication so that no more bulk shipments or pallets arrive at my house and that things go properly to uh warehouse. In this case, I’m letting that mistake be a portal to a little discovery or rediscovery, I suppose. Alright. Here’s where the story gets weird. I get home and it’s amazing how this woman’s like little moment of generosity has sparked some motivation for me. It’s got me out of burnout as an entrepreneur. And into inspired, I went home and power washed… Which how gross is that by the way. New house, we just moved here. Power washed the wall of my driveway. Which why driveways having wall? That’s just an aside.
I think with burnout, sometimes we need to lean into… There’s a natural cycle, right? There’s seasons of life. There’s… When we breathe, we inhale and we exhale. And I think with our work, we need times to inhale and get really intense and times to exhale. And yet, the narrative in our culture is keep going, keep going. Especially as an entrepreneur, keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going.
Don’t ever stop. That’s so counterproductive to the way that most things operate in life which is in this cyclical nature. And so I’ve learned at this point that if I’m feeling burnt out, it’s my brain and my heart and my body saying, “Just pause for a minute and take some time. And when your mojo is back lean into that.” I used to get really worked up and beat myself up when I was down. And now, I’m just… Now, I just have learned to say “A little bit more, I’m exhaling”. And at some point, I’ll inhale and at some point, I’ll exhale. And I actually know sitting here right now as I record this that over the next year, my burnout and motivation levels are going to be a signal wa…. Signal wave? I don’t know enough about calculus to actually use that analogy.
They’re going to be a wave there’s going to be ups and downs and they’re going to be even maybe somewhat regular for me and predictable. And when I can predict burnout or predict right before burnout, I can do things to slow or speed up the recovery from that time. But I don’t actually try to avoid it altogether because I actually think that it’s natural. It’s our body saying, “Hey, it’s time to take a pause. It’s time to exhale.” The last thing that I want to offer to you in this video that kind of breaks the format of most of my videos on tutorials on how to make virtual engagement and connection easy, my invitation if you are starting to feel a bit burnt out as an entrepreneur is look for the subtle hints of encouragement. And there’s a massive irony in this whole burnout frustration cards being shipped to my house sort of deal. And that was the rubber band that keeps we engage cards together says, “Let’s stick together” which is well, you know, a lovely little pun on cards sticking together. The irony and me realizing or remembering that this message was in the boxes I was carrying let’s stick together.
And earlier that morning, I was on Linkedin and caught a brilliant little clip of a Ted Talk. “What does it take to lift 200 or beyond?” As you will see, the answer is not what we expect….” About what it takes to live to 100 and beyond. And I’ll skip to uh the end here let me just fast forward a little bit. The number 3 way of uh living to 100 beyond is to quit smoking.
The number 2 way is to invest in your deep relationships. Turn the volume down. Number 2 way is to invest in your deep relationships and the number 1 way is pretty surprising is this idea of social integration. Which is familiarity with neighbors, like informal connections. Even though they might not be deep connections. My interaction with that woman who held the door for me while I carried all my boxes in, believe it or not is one little variable that makes a big difference in my chance of living beyond 100. But I would also argue that it makes a pretty big difference in your chance of surviving life as an entrepreneur or a really busy leader or educator.
Super fun to share a little bit of a story with you an unconventional format. If you liked this video, I’d love to hear your thoughts or your strategies on how to uncover burnout. Because most of my videos are like, “Here’s 7 ideas and kind of value-packed”. And this was a little bit more of a hang back and joy storytime. If you’ve got things that you know for you help you avoid burnout, I would love to know them in the comments and I bet everybody else who’s made it to this point in the video would also love to read them. Have an awesome, not burnt out day.